ilovefuzz.com

^ yep.

I pooped so much today that im tired. So I went on a spending spree and bought a PP2 Plus and a new knife. Now im mad cuz i have to fill up all the spots on the new power supply with pedals......oh wait...

this doxy is makin it worse
nausea yesterday
now stomach cramps today
but what seems to be a constant
is sweating buckets
i know its freakin hot outside
but this stuff is makin it worse
got a bunch of jobs lined up
so at least i can pay some of the bills soon
hmm electric?internet?parking tickets?
most likely ill be an asshole and not pay any

oohh what kinda knife wiz
got me one of them gerber miltary survival knives for xmas
the lmf 2 in black its freakin badass

so i heard back from the company. i totally blew the software test, and though the woman at the company is trying to hook me up with another position in the company it probably means that all here is lost and i'll be decamping sooner rather than later. here comes two weeks of miserable shit, packing and culling and trying to squeeze more shit into the truck than will fit so i can go to somewhere where i have no prospects other than applying for disability. now i think i'll take my medication early and check out for the rest of the day. well, now i understand why i was so pointlessly fried earlier...precognitive foreshadowing.

ryan summit wrote:this doxy is makin it worse
nausea yesterday
now stomach cramps today
but what seems to be a constant
is sweating buckets
i know its freakin hot outside
but this stuff is makin it worse
got a bunch of jobs lined up
so at least i can pay some of the bills soon
hmm electric?internet?parking tickets?
most likely ill be an asshole and not pay any

oohh what kinda knife wiz
got me one of them gerber miltary survival knives for xmas
the lmf 2 in black its freakin badass

sorry you are feeling shitty, I know what its like to lay around in pain for nothing when you should be working and getting paid.

Its a spyderco mule team edition 17. they basically take a really high end hard to get steel and press a limited number of the same knife every edition so you can try out super sttels for much cheaper. they come with no handles so you make your own. heres a pic of one I did a while ago.




more pics here if you are a knife guy.. http://s1137.photobucket.com/user/TPaza ... t=3&page=1

that's a really beautiful handle.

i shouldn't have gotten my hopes up over the job stuff...i guess i was hoping that something would make it so i didn't have to pack everything up and depart yet another of the piles of smouldering wreckage that litter my life story like the streets of Berlin in 1945. i was just lying flat on my back in bed with the tears running down my cheekbones, and my best friend gently eased me off the phone because i was starting to ramble now that i took my meds early in hopes of passing out by 9:00. have i mentioned my total exhaustion with life, or how much i wish i had the courage to shoot myself? the pills are kicking in now. dear God, i wish i had some weed.

god now i understand why people dont do there own tax return its the most confusing shit ever
fuck it fucking crap piece of shit did u do this at this time and what is this NO.

So many prank calls at work tonight, specifically suicide ones. These same guys have hit us the past few nights.
Some of them are the simple say something and hang up bullshit, but others are like really detailed and elaborate stories.
My co-worker got sucked in to a story and then yelled at / verbally abused for believing it. Like, what the fuck?

I just don't understand what compels someone to do something like this.

kbithecrowing wrote:So many prank calls at work tonight, specifically suicide ones. These same guys have hit us the past few nights.
Some of them are the simple say something and hang up bullshit, but others are like really detailed and elaborate stories.
My co-worker got sucked in to a story and then yelled at / verbally abused for believing it. Like, what the fuck?

I just don't understand what compels someone to do something like this.

One time i called this guy under the pretense that i was part of the john mccain party trying to solicit his vote and we talked for like 10 minutes about how john mccain was in vietnam and shit and eventually he was just like i dont like the republican party and i was like so youre a democrat and he was like no man i just dont like parties and i was like WHAT ABOUT GAY SEX PARTIES and hung up.

Gay sex parties?!? Where?

Fuck 72 hours worth of gum infection ache, fuck it in the ass.

dat low level anxiety bubbling under the surface, slowly growing in intensity. maybe I'll just start exercising more...even if it doesn't help I can shed some chub.

More shit. Depression. I just need some sort of certainty, and stability.

Was saying goodbye to my friend who is leaving the country for a little while, then I got a text saying I got a ticket for running a red light.
Just a ball of lonely frustration.

Car repairs. Boooooo.

The meager times are a-comin' again.